Remember Caeser, thou art mortal

There are worse crimes than burning books. One of them is not reading them.

–Joseph Brodsky

Fahrenheit 451. A very compelling book that produces more questions than answers. 3 times I have read the book, turned over each page and still the questions are at the forefront of my mind. I blame my nature of being and English graduate. It is rather hard not to read such a book without analysing it, dissecting each chapter into tiny little segments of criticism.Without that, a true opinion cannot be formed. However, regardless of my inability to give my thoughts of the book, an entire new thought had been awoken - a world with out books. Books help us realise that we are not immortal but we can immortalise ideas, people, worlds with the use of words upon paper.

A world without books would be rather bleak. Imagination and creativity would no longer satisfy our thirst for sense or surrealism. Books serve a purpose, whether fiction or non-fiction, they give us life. They draw meaning to the world. Many writers want to transport you to another world, give you that escapism. Books make the bleak world around us much more colourful. They give you something to talk about, to dream about, even fall in love or hate with. Books give you knowledge and inspiration, the ability to create something of your own. You live the lives of each character, imagining how they look and feel just by looking at a few simple words.

To fear a book is understandable, it reflects your shame and ideas of the world around you.To stop others from reading proves the point that you have something to hide. Many books have been banned throughout the times, simply because they were too scandalous for that particular period. What if they were written just to prove a point. That your eyes needed to be open, you need to see the world for what it really is. To burn books because you are afraid, or to stop people reading something you wish for them not to see is not the way of life.

A world without books, would be bleak and boring. We would live in a world full of people following the same routine, joining the same profession, thinking the same thoughts. We would become machines of our own lives.

What would you choose? A book or machine?

A Lonely Star in the Night Sky

Song playing: The Ballad of Mona Lisa - Panic! at the Disco


Sitting in the corner of the bar, she was invisible; the ghost, as many liked to call her. It was how she liked it, alone with no-one to bother her will small talk and awkwardness. No-one to annoy her with unoriginal line. Yet she found herself waiting - waiting for him to arrive. He was the opposite of her. He was alive.

He was late today. Normally that wouldn't bother her, but she had a task to complete and unfortunately, she needed him. He didn't need to know that part though. She checked all the times around her: the wall, the phone, the wrist - all the same. What was taking him so long? Time was clearly not on her side today.

Finally, after minutes passing of her deciding upon her next move, the familiar creak of the door was heard. As much as she disliked it, he made her feel something- passionate, alive, though she could never speak to him. As a result, people call her intimidating, a bitch, a snob. In fact she is none of those, she just finds it hard to speak to people - anxiety, fear of rejection play heavily upon her.

Instead she prefers to be alone, sitting at a table listening to his voice. His voice gave her all the power she needed. The ability to put pen to paper and create. He maybe an entertainer to the crowd but to her, to her he was her muse. Across the months she has had many muses, but they wilt rather quickly. Would he dry up in the desert sun, or will he set her mind alight?

That Girl

That girl you see at the bar isn't always drunk, just lacking in confidence. She isn't intimidating,  just shy. She isn't quiet, just unsure of how to talk to people. She prefers to listen and admire the people around her.  When she does talk, please don't mistake it as flirting as many people do.  She doesn't flirt, she just smiles with her eyes. She sits alone writing, she isn't a weirdo. She does her own thing regardless of what others think. That doesn't mean she is snobby and thinks you are beneath her, she likes being in her own bubble.

That girl doesn't like it when you accuse her of being ignorant. Nine time out of ten you are annoyingly creepy and stating the obvious. Yes she is writing in a bar, yes she is alone. She prefers to stay away from your kind, the kind that makes her stomach roll. She has a reason to ignore your advances. You don't understand being told 'no' for the umpteenth time. You insult her speech, her fashion style. That girl has her eyes set on someone else.


That guy. The guy who appears to be a walking cliche; his smile lights up the room, his eyes sparkling with mischief with a hint of playfulness. His hold makes you feel protected. His touch makes you feel warm inside. An accent that rivals the stereotypical Irish charm. An international crush. Almost perfect. That guy happens to be someone untouchable, out of her league, her friend's crush as it seems too. one could guess it's due to his ability to charm ant woman he comes across.

For now that girl will dream instead.

Almost Comfortably Numb

Not sure that the title of this post actually matches my current mood. I'm probably just numb. Today probably has been added to one of the worst days in my life. Normally I get the sense of how bad a day is going to be soon as I wake up; I normally sleep in or fall out of the bed (quite literally), but today started of like any other.

I don't particularly want to revisit my memories of today as I am simply happy enough that it is over. Yet I need to somehow justify my feelings, or lack of. After today's events, the Middle East has finally won and has tipped me over the edge. Who knows if normality will return? Maybe it won't.

Everything and everyone here is crazy, and that is putting it lightly. Sure you do get some wonderful people, but for the most part, life here sucks. I know that tomorrow will be a different story, so I have to live it out till then. As I always say; let's see what happens.

Write like no-one's watching...

Contrariwise…if it was so, it might be; and if it were so, it would be but as it isn’t, it ain’t. That’s logic.

In the ten months I have been here in the UAE, I have spent the majority of my Saturday evenings writing. Sometimes it is a simple ramble like this, other perhaps inspired by the weekly events that have occurred. Some mould themselves around the people I meet. Some may be created from a deep emotion stirred within me. They all have something in common; they are my masterpiece.  I may not as poetic as Shakespeare or dramatic as Tolkien, but to me they are my prized possessions. My life written on paper; they are words scrambled across the field of lines.  Occasionally they make sense, the rest evolve as an organised mess.  

It is not a case of how I write, the techniques used, or the formation of the words – it is what I write that matters most. I write what I know. To me, nobody is a literary genius; anyone can write. In the same breathe no-one can criticise the way you express yourself. There is no right or wrong.  Every word you put into a sentence is unique. It is your snowflake. There may be a moment in time were someone will be jealous or angry at your words, but you will learn to deal with that.

Whether it is the pen scratching paper or your fingers pressing the keys, the letters appear creating words that shape the sentences to come. They shine for you. They show your strengths, your weaknesses – but more importantly – your story. Your story is your own. No-one can speak any different.

This is my story. I write because I can. It’s my form of escapism (besides reading that is). I write whatever forms into my head. I remember someone asking me back in December “Why do you write so much?” 

Well if I were not to write, all the thoughts in my head have nowhere to go. They need to be released in to the physical world.  Scratch that; I would actually end up insane (if that were possible since I fell down the rabbit-hole a long time ago).  

Speaking of rabbit-holes, I think some people tonight have fell down them and have yet to escape. Everyone seems to be wilder than usual. With that in mind, this post shall take its’ leave and bid you farewell.

The further off from England the nearer is to France –

Then turn not pale, beloved snail but come and join the dance.

                Will you, wo’n’t you, will you, w’o’nt, will you join the dance?

                Will you, wo’n’t you, will you, w’o’nt, wont you join the dance?

I see hell in your eyes

Taken in by surprise
Touching you makes me feel alive
Touching you makes me die inside 
                                                      Slept so Long - Jay Gordon (Queen of the Damned OST)

Saturday night. A night were I would normally spend it planning for the lessons the next day. However, on a rare occasion I had the Sunday off. To celebrate this, me and a few of my fellow friends decided to have a night out; and as per usual we ended up in Paco's. What a surprise! Though hindsight would have been a useful thing to have before I went out. My first omen was drinking wine. Wine is my weakness, my kryptonite. Seriously it makes me so emotional that I cry at everything and anything.

1) 'First cry of the night' award goes to Diesel band and their rendition of Red, Red, Wine (UB40). Sorry guys, but being far away from my parents I was bound to get homesick at some point and unfortunately this was the moment in time were it would decide to appear. My dad. Yes I am a daddy's girl and this song reminded me of him. Whenever this song would be played I could always guess the next words that come out of his mouth "do you know what UB40 stands for?" and if I said no it was result in a long conversation about the 'Unemployment Benefit, Form 40'. My dad has to have the last word and always has to be right. That my friends is where I get my stubbornness from and my bitchy attitude.

2) 'Worst cry of the night' award goes to getting my extensions caught in my hair. Normally it wouldn't bother me getting my hair all tangled up since it happens on a daily occasion. However, add alcohol and pent up frustration to the mix then tears will be the end result. A very pitiful thing to cry at, something I am sure of.

3) 'Very emotional cry of the night' award for the second time goes to Diesel band. Other nights I have listened to them perform Zombie (The Cranberries) and Linkin Park my mind just lost it. Too many memories came flooding back at once and the tears just poured. Childhood memories, recent memories, family, friends, those I left behind. Homesickness what something I thought I would experience at random intervals during my time here.

For now I will be staying away from the wine and stick to other drinks and hopefully the emotional roller-coaster will subside.

Melissa

                        

Nossa, nossa. Assim você me mata (PG rated version)

Ai, se eu te pego
Ai, ai, se eu te pego

Sitting in the bar, writing these words, I feel like I am almost home. Loud words pounding in my ears, the bass vibrating through my body. Peace. After the day I have endured, the noise and familiarity was welcomed. Today made me look at the cracks in my life and fill them with something new (and not poly-filler as my dad would say to me). New friends, a new career, a new home in the UAE. Well maybe after I get used to the fact that my parents are not here to hold my hand and guide me through life.

At this moment in time a band is playing, well playing mainstream music that I dislike (actually when I have had a few drinks I find myself singing along to anything). However my music opinion aside, the sound that they produce is rather great. In fact they may have introduced me to a song I had never heard of before; the title of this post actually.

With a Bacardi Breezer in one hand and my pen in the other, I am set for the night. To do this sort of writing, the freeing of my emotions and the letting go of what is inside of me, I have left two of my friends outside to drink their vodka.  Is it socially acceptable to be all emo and write in a bar when I could do this at home where it is comfortable and warm. To be honest with you all, I am actually quite introvert. The best moments of my life have been when I succumb to the isolation of my own company. I would apologise for the rambling but currently the guitar riffs I hear are trying to help my body lose control, and I need to be careful before I start writing some x-rated story. Yeah that has happened before, but for now lets focus on the band.

Right now it appears to be someone's birthday and the band is getting the whole crowd involved. Scenes like this warm the heart. The song choices are amazing (yes I know I said they were mainstream) and they have also chosen songs that make you stop and think "oh wow. I haven't heard that song in a while". Then all of a sudden your body develops a mind of its own; first the tapping of the foot, then the rhythmic leg bounce and before you know it, your body is upon the dance-floor moving with a spirit so free that it is contagious to everyone around begins to dance -or if you are like me then your are looking like you are having some sort of fit. Ok, back to the band. See, I digress rather easily.

The band is named Diesel, and they are actually a group that can play. I have seen my acts before in local bars and pubs and the song choices are more cheesy kareoke than entertainment. Yet Diesel manages to avoid this and create an atmosphere that is so electric, the rhythm of the music can be felt throughout your body, racing through your veins and hitting your soul in all the right places.
You just have to let go and let the music run through you.

Natasha, or Tash as some people call her, is one of the vocalists. She has a beautiful voice and definitely knows how to start a party in style. Let say girls, she has the best sense of style I have seen in a long time. Though lets not take that away from the amazing voice she has. For someone to vary their style of singing the way she does, is incredible. The moves on that girl in heels whilst she is singing are simple but they capture the attention of both men and women in the room.
Next there is Patrick, another vocalist who looks almost like Bruce Willis. He reminds me of a man with a young boy's soul-so full of life and the ability to range his songs from those before my birth to things like Macklemore's Thrift-Shop. That has got to be a skill.
We also have present a guitarist called Thomas and the bass player named Dean. The way those guys capture your attention through the riffs is astounding. The way they move their fingers...in fact I cannot say what I want to say cause it would be highly indecent and inappropriate for such a review. Though the coordinated outfits would make any woman's hormones go crazy.
Finally we have the drummer - Marcus. You can see the talent in the sounds he produces and the emotions showing on his face. The sound made creates a new version of the song taking it from cheesy pop to almost rock-like and alternative. The way he hits those drums a girl could only imagine. Ok lets try to get this back on to topic before the tone will turn into something completely and unintentionally dirty.

The band look like they actually belong together; like pieces of a jigsaw they fall into the correct place. They also remind me of a snowflake. So unique and beautiful, yet they create a masterpiece when placed next to each other. When you look at a masterpiece, it sometimes brings you close to tears. That is your soul letting you know that you should grasp this moment with both hands and treasure it. That is what the audience should feel when they are in the presence of Diesel. A moment never to forget. Each moment so unique.

I could continue to write this piece for as long as I wanted too, but I could never give the band enough attention and justice they deserve.  So I shall end this note rocking out to Linkin Park and ironically it didn't really matter that I was some girl sitting in the corner of a bar writing this. In the end this me. This is the music. This is Diesel.

Ai, se eu te pego,
Ai, ai, se eu te pego
Read more at http://lyricstranslate.com/en/ai-se-eu-te-pego-ah-when-i-get-my-hands-you.html#F770Ovgbk6jU2Upy.99

Ai, se eu te pego,
Ai, ai, se eu te pego
Read more at http://lyricstranslate.com/en/ai-se-eu-te-pego-ah-when-i-get-my-hands-you.html#F770Ovgbk6jU2Upy.99

Ai, se eu te pego,
Ai, ai, se eu te pego
Read more at http://lyricstranslate.com/en/ai-se-eu-te-pego-ah-when-i-get-my-hands-you.html#F770Ovgbk6jU2Upy.99

Ai, se eu te pego,
Ai, ai, se eu te pego
Read more at http://lyricstranslate.com/en/ai-se-eu-te-pego-ah-when-i-get-my-hands-you.html#F770Ovgbk6jU2Upy.99

Ai, se eu te pego,
Ai, ai, se eu te pego
Read more at http://lyricstranslate.com/en/ai-se-eu-te-pego-ah-when-i-get-my-hands-you.html#F770Ovgbk6jU2Upy.99

Ai, se eu te pego,
Ai, ai, se eu te pego
Read more at http://lyricstranslate.com/en/ai-se-eu-te-pego-ah-when-i-get-my-hands-you.html#F770Ovgbk6jU2Upy.99

Ai, se eu te pego,
Ai, ai, se eu te pego
Read more at http://lyricstranslate.com/en/ai-se-eu-te-pego-ah-when-i-get-my-hands-you.html#F770Ovgbk6jU2Upy.99

For 'twas not into my ear you whispered but into my heart.

'Twas not my lips you kissed, but my soul
                                                                -Judy Garland


So today has included a mixture of feelings: love, lust, hate and fear. So where to begin? This post will only focus on love and lust as the other two emotions are too raw to write about now.

Love:

Well, to be honest, love is a strong word that I shouldn't be using right now. I would say its more confusing than anything else. Dreams do crazy things to ones head. They make you think of things that you would never have thought of before. I was perfectly fine before I started dreaming. Perhaps I'm only attracted to the person in my dreams and not the person in reality. Whatever it is, it will not go away. Every night consists of the same dream. Right down to the nitty gritty details. This does lead us on to the next emotion - lust. Here, I will simply re-post a poem that sums it all up

Lust:

The gazing of ocean blue against earthly brown,

Velvet whispers, lips he does caress.

A soft embrace, his hand ascends towards her crown.

Brush of her hair, a sweetly placed kiss,

Heart against heart, soul against soul, one they become.

He soaks in his wonderful beauty.

Actions of love envelop her unclothed bosom,

A swift taste of her fresh honey.

One look up at the angel; she begs for mercy,

The promise of his love forever.

Succumbing to his advance, she gives him the key.

They key to her heart and her forever.

The feeling of both bodies, the sound of heaven –

The melody of peace, joy and love.

The perfect fit for her cherished garden,

The perfect fit of his heightened touch.

Collapsing back to earth, the lovers revel in each other’s sight

Each other’s wings of security

He sends his spoken truth to his mate, gives their love the gift of flight

To soar higher than other love for all eternity.

In the name of...

...love

To let someone go because you loved them and it seemed like the right thing to at the time, is just utter bullsh*t. In my defence, I do believe that I loved him but I never let him go because of that. I let him go because of silly insecurities that got too much. Silly thoughts that crept into my mind way too many times every day.

How is it possible to let a thought consume so much of my daily life is surely baffling. But it's not just this that has my life all in a tizz. January 9th, saw me break my foot after a night out. From then I went through the stages of anger, self-pity, stress, and depression; just in a total of four weeks. It was during this time that I finally had a grasp on my life, of what I actually wanted. The list is as follows:

1) A career. Yes surely that is a given but I actually want to teach. My placement at HMP Durham has been a real eye opener. To see those turn to crime because of their upbringing, or as a student told me "they never got the chance to go to school and stay there", was shocking. I left one lesson with a smile on my face as one had stated " I really enjoyed that lesson Miss, I felt like I learnt something". It made me feel proud, like I had accomplished something.

2) A family. Someday I want to settle down with my own boyfriend/partner/husband, with whatever children I am blessed with. Again, the near loss of my nana opened my eyes to how cruel life can be. One minute your on the road to recovery, just to take what seems like 10 steps back, towards death's door again. Hopefully, my nana will get better soon, and positive energy will be restored into the family. It feels like the full family is drained emotionally. Events like this do make you appreciate what you have, and that you can't take life for granted. Even if it is short, you have to live it.

3) My life. I want to live a life that is mine. Dreams and goals that are mine. But this also includes having a healthy life. I don't want to be really skinny again, that's not me. I just want to be happy and free. I suppose I will feel that way again once the stress of waiting on test results passes, and when my Nana is home again. I want to find happiness with someone. Someone who will let me have my insecurities, but will help me through them, instead of dismissing them like they are nothing. Someone to understand that I need a compromise, not me putting in all the effort to make something work.  Someone that understands I need my space.

I could write a conclusion to this post but its not necessary. I am what I am, and what I want I will achieve. Someday.

Boost up those brochure sales by pimping out your staff!

Well. That is all I have to say. Today was clearly one of those good days, were I don't look like a right mess at work. So it all started with an idea to boost up the Christmas brochures and B4L. I always do badly, that's a given when I'm at work, so here was a tip given to me by a friend...

"Make a sign that for every brochure a customer buys, they will be entered in a draw for a date with a member of staff (the customer can even choose which person). Or just pimp someone out completely"

Yeah cause that will work. Apparantly it does as I am getting pimped out already.

First there was a young gentleman who gave me a flirty smile and was eyeing me up (according to another member of staff), and he was darn good-looking too. Then a boy who must have been about 12 or 13 was a right charmer. He handed me the money with a right swagger calling me darl, yeah his dad taught him well. He will be a right heart-throb when he is older. Bless.

So that was a good day at work. The full day of flirting my way through sales.

Oh as a side note, I also managed to knock down a sign at work by throwing a ball.

All in one day ey.

Just One Huge Rant

I give up. I really do.

Today I realised I have blogged much these past few months and I've celebrated with this complaint. What the heck am I doing with my life? I seem to be living my life with other people's expectations. They want me to be this, that, or the other not taking into consideration what I want. I want to be a prison tutor, but no, apparrently I'm too weak or too much of a pushover to even succeed. Either that or I'm more likely to sleep with one of my students. Great judgement of my life. Why do people need to feel like they have to judge me, or mock what I want to do? Is their life that boring that they feel the need to belittle mine? That, I do not have the answer to.

Another point I'd like to make is my love life. This is were I get a little hypocritical. I expect my love to trust and respect me but I can't seem to trust him. Well not so much him, but others around. Low self esteem and confidence issues have taken control (well thats one excuse thats highly used), the other reason is I know how the majority of skanks work. How can I say to someone I love, yes love, that I don't like him having a life outside of me when there is a lot of temptation around? Oh I hate the label boyfriend and girlfriend too. Just so tacky and overused. Once labels have been placed people expect you to act a certain way, compromise, and basically give up your life to be with that person. Believe me I've seen it happen. You get caught up in a bubble and once an outsider worms their way in, everything changes. Why others feel the need to invade a bubble of which is not theirs I have no idea. Again it all comes down to expectations.

People expect me to be able to read minds, to be perfectly happy all the time, to be normal. Well I'm afraid the more expectations you have of me, the more it those expectations will be thrown out of the window or down a drain somewhere.
Oh and a final thing, why do people constantly make plans with me when they know they are going to make up some bullshit excuse and cancel!

Love from an angry person

A Random Quiz

1. Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 18, and find line 4. Slowly opens its mouth, and these words come out
2. Stretch your left arm out as far as you can, What can you touch?A pillow
3. Before you started this survey, what were you doing? Watching CSI
4. What is the last thing you watched on TV? CSI:Crime Scene Investigation
5. Without looking, guess what time it is. Half 7ish
6. Now look at the clock. What is the actual time? 19:39
7. With the exception of the computer, what can you hear?Parents talking
8. When did you last step outside? What were you doing? It was when I came home from work, I stepped outside to play with my dog
9. Did you dream last night?Yes unfortunately
10. Do you remember your dreams?Again yes
11. When did you last laugh? A few hours ago at work
12. Do you remember why / at what?I laughed at my co-workers moving tables and destroying the place :)
13. What is on the walls of the room you are in?Masks
14. Seen anything weird lately? Erm can't recall anything, but my brain is fried so
15. What is the last film you saw?Pictue Perfect with Jennifer Aniston
16. If you could live anywhere in the world, where would you live?I would live somewhere in the UK or Germany
17. If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy? I would buy a brand new car, a house with a walk-in wadrobe filled with loads of clothes.
18. Tell me something about you that most people don't know. I have an obsession with masks and dolls
19. What is the last thing you downloaded onto your computer? Some songs by Halfway Home
20. Last time you swam in a pool?Phwoar must be about four years ago now
21. Type of music you like most? Mostly the alternative stuff
22. Type of music you dislike most?RAVE!!!!!!
23. What was the last thing you bought?A KitKat Chunky Caramel
24. Have you ever ridden on a motorbike?Nope but I want to :)
25. If you could eat lunch with one famous person, who would it be?Jared Leto or Synyster Gates
26. Which store would you choose to max out your credit card?New Look
27. What time is bed time?Any time I get tired
28. How many tattoos do you have?Eight with one upcoming
29. Do you carry a donor card?Yes I do and I'm proud of it
30. Who was the last person you ate dinner with? No one :(
31. Is the glass half empty or half full?Depends what mood I'm in
32. What's the farthest-away place you've been? Gran Canaria
33. Have you ever won a trophy? Yes in primary school year 6
34. Are you a good cook?It depends what I'm cooking
35. How many keys on your key ring?Too many to count and then some
36. What kind of car do you drive?None ate the moment, but soon to be a fiat punto
37. What are your best physical features?My eyes and smile apparently
38. If you could go anywhere in the world on vacation where would you go?Florida, Paris or Venice

Chocolates and Wine and Sex

I think that my life lately is revolving around chocolates that much that I even dream about them at night. In fact last night I dreamt that I made a cake from ferrero rochers and red wine. My oh my! it looked so delicious and yummy and I was actually drooling when I woke up.
I think my chocolate addiction is getting out of hand now. Not that I'm complaining though, as I now think I should experiment more with my baking :)
Moving on to another sweet topic, since a friend mentioned that he had a craving for cheesecake, Ive been really tempted to make one however last time I forgot to include the icing sugar and so the once lovely banana and peach cheesecake ended up being very bitter. This time I want to make a very sensual strawberry cheesecake with a white wine and berry compte sauce. How yummy.
Now for the sex part of my title. There's actually nothing that I want to say. I just thought I'd make a more interesting title and since 9 out of 10 guys who read will notice the word sex and nothing else. I can't remember where I read that piece of information but it seems fairly accurate. And I wonder if people will just read this just because of the title. Now if only I were to include some raunchy stories....

Well thats it for now, tootles
x

I would fly you to the moon and back if you'll be . . . if you'll be my baby.

Now the above quote has nothing to do with this post, I just happen to be listening to the song :) Though it does  kinda fit with my mood of today. Which is great. 

Making plans with someone got me thinking of a place I haven't been for awhile. A beautiful park, where I used to run.  Its wonderful scenery had me inspired for many poems, and also pictures. I'm hoping to go back, even though its a train journey away, just to take some more photographs. Maybe feel inspired once more. 

 I've got a ticket for a world where we, we belong
So would you be my baby?
Savage Garden - To the Moon and Back 

The Burn

Curse you,

You immortal child -

You demon of life.

Damn you

To the unending of Hell;

And the beginning of pain.

Vex you,

You impetious life

With a heart of stone.

Blight you,

You little imp, you sprite

Of fire and ice.

You have the face of an Angel,

But the soul of hate.

Those that cant show warmth and joy to you,

Only show your reflection of pain.

The carcass of your face,

(Once was the skin of a saint)

Crumbles before your very eyes.

The Angle soon begins to fade.

No longer the Angel,

So pure not tainted.

Now becomes the demon -

Ill-spirited and evil

Heaven or Hell

Now after reading Milton's Paradise Lost, I have come to the conclusion that when Judgment Day is upon us, I wish to go to Hell. It may seem that this is the worst possible choice that a person can make but I can't bring myself to care.


Milton says that it's very quiet in Heaven. The word "silent" is repeated several times. The heavenly choir is there, but it is mute. It seems that is all a bit too perfect even for Milton to describe.Everyone is standing around just looking at God:


"From his sight received/Beatitude past utterance" (Book 3, l.62)  


And for this reason, why go to Heaven if there is no passion, no noise, just peace and quiet. Didn't God say that in Heaven we can have anything yet people are just standing like statues. 
I'd rather go to hell and live in a state of pandemonium. Where I can feel passion and have fantastical conversations. 
   

If you couldn't tell... :)

 

Ok this picture should really be stapled onto my forehead. I created my blog account many months ago, I have poorly neglected it. Instead of uploading my thoughts on to this, I simply forgot.


Yeah, I'm very forgetful. Unless its to do with something like NCIS or CSI.
I wonder if theres a day or month where I remember to say something out loud. Make that type. Technicalities.


Here I am rambling about nothing, when in essence I have a lot to say. I forget about my friends sometimes. Yeah I know thats bad but nine times out of ten, I'm dreaming of my own world.
I forget about uni work, but come thats pretty standard for students of today. But when you forget something important like how you feel about someone then you're in trouble. Oh well. I think it's time I brought out the sticky notes and annoy my parents with them. And maybe one day I wont forget to tell that someone how I feel before it's too late.


How happy is the blameless vestal's lot? The world forgetting, by the world forgot. 
Alexander Pope.