That Dark Cloud

Yes, that dark cloud has once again rolled over and brought back the d word with it, and for the first time I realised I couldn't give a care in the world that it's happened. I'm done. I'm over it. I really don't care.

I'm not that naive to think it would never come back, but I guess this is what happens when things are looking great for a change.

Right now I'm fed up with being stuck in a different country. I'm fed up playing small talk every day. I'm fed up having to pretend everything is fucking fine when it's not. I'm done with the long distance. I'm done with having to put up with lazy people. I'm done having to put up with people who just can't do their job.   I even realised that I don't care about not washing my hair for 4 days (dry shampoo is amazing). I don't care that I've put on 2kg. It appears that I have reached my tipping point.

I try to focus on the things that make me happy, but at this moment in time they just make me sad.

I know that this post doesn't even make sense but I just need to write. My neighbour next door isn't really helping either. Like seriously midnight is for sleeping not fricking dancing around in heels and banging on every wall possible.

The dark cloud is just part of my life now, and I know it will pass but until then I'm stuck. I'm stuck in a never ending cycle of depressive thoughts and notions. I'm so tired that I want to sleep and wake up when the Summer is here. I'm just done.